


I Love You

by shriquinn



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alcohol, Cutting, F/M, Fluff, Healing, Mild Language, Romance, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-24
Updated: 2015-01-24
Packaged: 2018-03-08 20:19:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3222128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shriquinn/pseuds/shriquinn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Imagine: Feeling heartbroken when Dean breaks off your friends with benefits because he's fallen in love with someone, only to reveal its you he's in love with.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Love You

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Idea, characters and Supernatural NOT MINE. Shri, however, is. Enjoy. Yes, Sam is comforter and Dean is emotionally blocked at first. Whoo-hoo! XD I am hoping this doesn't get super angsty at the beginning. It will be fluff towards the end. Warnings: Language, alcohol consumption, suicidal thoughts and cutting. (I never thought I would do it, but no one really knows what anyone is capable of until you put them in that kind of situation.) No one will die, I can't do that for the life of me, and that is why in my head, Cas is still an angel WITH his grace. Takes place in a time before "Meta Fiction." Shri's hiding spot, by the way, is the "panic room" from the bunker. XD I just thought I'd throw that out there. None of the songs I mention are mine either. All songs belong to Queen. I was listening to a playlist on youtube and flipped through some songs. No "chick flick moments" were harmed in the making of this fanfic.

"I can't do this anymore, Shri," Dean said raking a hand through his hair. He wanted to say it, but those three words would not come to his lips today nor past them. "I'm in love with someone else," he finally managed.

"What? With who?" she asked a bit frustrated at his unwillingness to continue their deal they had made a year ago now. She would have jumped down his throat had it not been for the fact that she had made progress in controlling her emotions.

"Personal," he replied before walking out the door before he heard her other comments. Quietly, Dean placed his hands in his pockets. He made it to Baby before his emotions could get the better of him. He wanted desperately to go back inside and tell her that everything was all right. That it was Shri he was in love with, but Dean didn't want to get attached and he honestly wasn't ready to make a point in how he felt. Emotions were stressful and time consuming.

"Know what? _Fuck you_ , Winchester!" Shri commented glaring at him as a look of pain crossed her face as she wandered quietly to her room. She thought about a hundred things that wouldn't seem possible. _He doesn't love me. He never did. Maybe I'm not worth this space? Am I even worthy of him?_ Shri wondered as the tears started flowing down her cheeks. She wandered to your bathroom and took out a razor and placed the blade to the skin of her upper arm. She watched the scarlet water pour down her skin as she whispered something unintelligible before she passed out.

Sam was getting back from a quick shop that he had said he was going on. "Hey, Shri," he said smiling a bit sheepishly wandering to her room. When he heard nothing, Sam worried. He wandered into her room as he saw her in the bedroom. Sam was too polite to go inside the bathroom unless he knew something was seriously out of the ordinary. He knew that something was troubling her though what, he couldn't place. "You wanna come out and talk about this, Shri?" he asked.

"Huh?" Shri asked coming to consciousness. _How long had she been out? A few minutes? A few hours? All she knew was she wasn't having this._ "Why, Sam? So you can tell me _I told you so_?" she asked as the acid flew past her lips. Fine, Shri was pissed with every right to be. Dean couldn't be in love with someone else, _could he_? She mused quietly to herself.

"And maybe I should have phrased that a bit differently?" Sam asked behind the door. He slunk down to the bare carpeting that was the bunker where he knew she loved to hide when she was feeling down and out, but this? This was new, even for her. "I knew something was going to happen," he said with a sigh. "Fine, you know what, Shri? If you come out here and at least join me for dinner, I'll tell you something I bet you haven't noticed," he commented soothingly.

"Really? Like what, if you don't mind me asking?" she asked still a bit sour as she opened the door to her room. Her right upper arm was cut badly and Shri knew Sam would say something. She was clad in her plaid pyjamas and matching fuzzy slippers. Sam knew well enough that these were the ones she usually wore when she was down.

"First off, let me see your arm. I see you looking at it like you did something wrong," he told her. She lifted the sleeve to where the scar was visible but there was little sign that anything had happened. "Gabriel? Cas?" he asked her.

"Dad," she replied. "He knew something was bothering me and we spoke for a bit. You know its been too long since last I saw him," she replied tearfully. "You go ahead, I'm just gonna listen and eat," she told him quietly eating a portion of the bison burger Sam had gotten her. "Thanks...by the way," she commented almost as a second thought.

"No problem," he smiled looking down at his salad and fruit. "Oh, Gabriel," he looked at her almost wide eyed and then went back to a neutral expression and tone. "Just don't do the cutting again and I won't tell Dean what I saw," he commented.

Shri nodded dipping her fries in the vanilla shake and taking a bite.

"I saw Dean outside...sad as hell," he said not really sure how to begin. "I think I know what's bugging him, but I want you to know that this is clearly confidential. As in don't ask, you better not tell. Even if Dean asks, you don't tell him," he gave her a look that was close to the infamous bitch face and she laughed and nodded her understanding. When Sam started to continue, Shri could faintly hear something blasting outside the windows. Her ears twitched as she strained to listen past the window's sound blocking and placed her hand lightly over Sam's to tell him to keep quiet.

"Is that You're My Best Friend?" Shri mused. All Sam could do was shrug. "Rhetorical, but I think I get it," she said.

_Hours earlier after the fight..._

Dean had gone to the bar down the street to try to drown his sorrows in his favorite liquor, whiskey. He usually drank it straight, but tonight, he couldn't care less. He had it in shots, glasses and the vast variety. Queen's "Need Your Love" was playing in the background as Dean thought about Shri.

 _Dammit! What was I thinking? I should have just told her my feelings, but that's against this code of hunters. Its not safe, is it? I couldn't tell her...why? Am I that heartless to give her up? Would it be worth it? I don't think I'm worth her time...yet she spends most of it with me at the Bunker. Sometimes she'll spend it with Sammy which is fine and all, but I want her to myself..._ He cut himself off after a bit of thought.

He looked at the bartender who had already refilled his glass without Dean even realizing it. The woman behind the counter was trying to seduce him with her eyes and hair. The way she smiled and everything else. All he could think about was Shri. _Dammit! One night, one night and I'd like to be able to forget about her, but with the other woman looking at me, and I damn well can't forget about her._

He shook his head and set down some money. "Thanks, but not tonight, sweetheart," he told her. She looked at him pleadingly. He shook his head again. "Got someone else keeping my bed warm tonight. I doubt you'd like to meet her if we did," he told her. She backed off slightly with a huff and turned around and wandered to another patron. Dean wandered outside and went to his Baby. Well, his first Baby, his original love, until he had met Shri. He shook his head to clear his thoughts as he put the Impala into gear and drove back to the Bunker where they were staying for awhile.

Dean's idea after a restless hunt and long winded conversation with Sam. Shri had tried remaining neutral but sided with Dean about going to the bunker. As she had said, it was safer there than any dank motel room they were liable to find. And since they were in Kansas, Lebanon to be exact, they may as well save their money and hide out for a bit. Sam conceded and agreed with the other two, but under his own hesitations.

When he made it back to the bunker, Dean sat outside in his car for awhile until an idea came to mind. Sure it was chick flick based and all, but he had seen it work in a million movies and television shows, so it had better work for him. He sat outside the car with a remorseful look etched onto his face as he saw Sam walk past him with what appeared to be the food from the run he had made earlier. Dean raised his hand in greeting as the younger Winchester did the same. "Hey, Sammy," Dean said casually.

"Dean, what happened?" the younger asked noticing the look on his brother's face. "Did you and Shri get into a fight again?" he continued not hearing anything from his brother.

"I told her I was in love, dammit. It wasn't supposed to happen like this...not how I had it planned out in my head anyways," he commented.

"With anyone specific?" Sam asked now curious. "Hey, I mean, brother confidentiality as always, and just for your info, you are being a jerk to her if I couldn't tell," he commented knowing what would happen if he did that.

"Bitch!" Dean retorted in the half serious way he usually did. "Who cares? I mean I told her it was personal. I went to the bar to get some drinks and of course, bartender chick is hitting on me," he raised his hands in submission before he could hear Sam ask anything about it. "Look, dude, before you start telling me what I should and should not do, I did not, I repeat _DID NOT_ do anything with her. I simply told her that I wasn't interested. I kept thinking about earlier and how it replayed in my head. You know as well as I do I was never really one for the emotional shit," he told his brother. Then he lowered his voice and whispered to his brother, "I'm in love with her, Sam. I've never really felt this way before, dude. I'm not one for chick flicks and shit like that, but she does something that I never thought was possible, dude."

Sam looked at his brother a bit confused as the wheels in his brain started turning. "Oh...so that's why you're out here? Did you say something that may have upset her? Cause the last time that happened, I remember explicitly what she did," he commented. "Look, dude, I'll go in there. You find whatever you need to get yourself back in there for her, I don't want her father on our asses for some ridiculous thing that could have been avoided."

Dean simply nodded and went to the Impala and turned it on full blast to a song he knew Shri would recognize. Though he hoped she would get the message before it was too late for him.

_Back to now..._

When Shri went to the window, all she could think about was Dean. She hoped he could see you. "Should I go outside and see him, Sam?" she asked a bit nervously with the teenage excitement lingering in her tone.

He nodded and pushed her towards the door leading outside. "I think he has a surprise for you, too," he smiled broadly.

Shri nodded and kissed Sam on the cheek. "Thanks, bro," she replied leaving a stunned Sam holding his cheek blushing slightly. When Shri reached Dean, she wrapped him in a hug and was surprised when he held her close to him as though she was nothing more than a porcelain doll. She looked up at him and noticed he looked as though he had been crying a bit. She kissed his cheek and smiled up at him.

"Shri," he said looking at her nervously. "What I said before, I meant it, but I just wasn't really sure how to express it. I love you. No, I take that back. I am _in_ love with you. I don't know if you have noticed, but I have grown more attached to you since we started that 'friends with benefits' thing. Yes, fine, you knew out of the gates that I am an emotionally screwed up wreck that should have no business dragging other people into this life. Like you, Shri, I didn't want to drag you into this. Yet, you were born into it without much of a choice in the matter. I want you to have this, Shri, the ring my father gave my mother for their wedding. It may not be much, but I promise to make you the happiest ever," he said smiling into the crook of her neck.

She blushed and ran her fingers lightly through his hair making him move a bit closer to her. "I love you, too, Dean," she replied smiling softly.


End file.
